Written by Mrs Tracy Wahl, Primary School Principal. As first published in The Muse magazine (August 2025).
“Where do I belong?”
It’s a question that shapes every child’s sense of self — not always in words, but in the quiet spaces of their hearts. In education, we often speak of belonging as a value, a goal, and a foundation for growth. But belonging is more than a checkbox; it’s a feeling, a lived experience that tells a child, “You matter. You are safe. You are part of us.”
A child’s ability to learn, grow, and thrive is closely linked to how safe and accepted they feel. Belonging creates a sense of safety — and safety allows children to take risks, explore their potential, and become their fullest selves.
Family: The First Circle of Safety and Belonging
For most children, the family is the first place where belonging is formed. Whether it’s a parent, caregiver, or extended family member, this space provides the emotional security every child needs.
At home, children are fed, comforted, guided, and loved. They learn their first values and encounter a framework of belief, trust, and forgiveness. It’s often the place where they are introduced to the rhythms of faith, tradition, and identity.
When home is a place of stability and care, children are equipped with the inner confidence they need to face the outside world. A child who feels safe at home carries that security into every space they enter.
School: A Second Home, A Shared Community
The decision parents make when choosing a school is significant. It’s not simply about academics, but about finding a place where their child can belong, thrive, and grow.
Schools are more than buildings with books and whiteboards. They are living communities where children spend most of their day — and they must be places where belonging is intentionally built and protected.
When children walk through school gates and feel welcomed, known by name, and included in the life of the school, they experience psychological safety. This is the foundation on which learning happens. When a child feels safe, they can raise their hand without fear, ask for help, take risks, and celebrate their strengths.
Belonging in school is cultivated when children participate in clubs, join in school events, collaborate with peers, and feel heard and valued by their teachers. When their culture, interests, and personality are recognised and affirmed, they begin to feel: “This is a place where I fit in — and where I can grow.”
Teams and Groups: The Power of Showing Up
Whether it’s a sports team, choir, chess club, or drama group, being part of a team gives children a deeper sense of connection and collective responsibility.
Here, commitment becomes a life lesson. It’s not about being the best player or performer — it’s about being present, supporting others, showing up to every practice, and giving your best.
In these shared spaces, children learn:
- How to collaborate with different personalities
- What it means to lose with grace and win with humility
- The value of persistence and consistency
- The importance of community goals over individual glory
These are powerful, transferable lessons that stretch far beyond the school years.
“Belonging doesn’t require us to change who we are; it requires us to be who we are.”
— Brené Brown
The Wider Community: A Sense of Place
Outside of school and family, children also belong to neighbourhoods and local communities. When they participate in community events, faith groups, or sports clubs, they begin to understand their role as contributing citizens.
Community involvement offers a broader view of the world. It allows children to engage with others from different backgrounds, appreciate diversity, and build relationships based on shared values and goals.
And when children are included in meaningful ways — given tasks, responsibilities, and opportunities to lead or help — their sense of self-worth grows.
Belonging Is a Gift — and a Responsibility
As parents and educators, we are the architects of belonging. It’s our responsibility to create environments where children feel safe, included, and empowered — where they are not only accepted, but also expected to contribute.
Belonging is not passive. It asks us — and our children — to show up, participate, and care. It’s not just about being part of a group, but about helping others feel part of it too. When children understand this, they move beyond simply feeling safe — they begin to feel significant.
True belonging is built, not assumed. It happens when children feel seen, heard, and valued. It’s nurtured when they are encouraged to contribute, supported when they stumble, and celebrated as they grow.
Each of us — child, parent, teacher — is part of something bigger. And when we live with that awareness, we create schools, families, and communities that are not only places of learning, but places of purpose, identity, and connection.
Let’s continue to build environments where belonging isn’t just spoken about — it’s lived and felt, shaping the whole child every single day.
Click here to read about pastoral care and student wellness at Cannons.