It’s a well-known fact that children cannot educate themselves. Given the realities of today’s world, neither can parents take sole responsibility for the education of their children and, similarly, while teachers may be able to school children on their own, they, too, cannot assume total responsibility for the education of a child. Educating a child is a team effort and all three members of the team, child, parent and teacher, need to play their part. A triangle beautifully illustrates this relationship.
Obviously, if education is to be truly child-centred, the child occupies the apex of the triangle and the parent and teacher together provide the base. Each player occupying a corner of the triangle has a vital role to play. Take the child out of the picture and everything falls flat. Without the teacher, the triangle falls over and the same applies if we remove the parent. The triangle analogy works well here – a triangle is a stable structure and can take on many forms and sizes and, because every child is different, it has to be so.
How does the child hold up his or her corner? The child needs to attend school every day. She needs to apply herself to working hard, be it in class or at home, doing homework, assignments or preparing for exams. He needs to behave appropriately, show respect for peers and teachers. The list goes on and becomes more extensive as the child progresses through the grades.
The parent corner is indispensable. The parents provide a stable home and ensure that the child has the necessary material needs such as food, shelter, clothing, school materials and security. The parent corner is also responsible for the emotional support of the child. No matter how poor the home is, what is important is that it is a home filled with love, parent presence and stability. It is also at home where the child should learn about respect, honesty, tolerance and manners (preferably by imitating the parents). The list of parent responsibilities is a long one. If you’re not prepared to take on these responsibilities, you shouldn’t become a parent.
The teacher corner is represented by the school and teachers. They need to ensure that the school environment is conducive to good teaching and learning. There needs to be enough clean space, light, seating and work surface for safe and healthy teaching and learning to take place. Teachers need to be present, punctual, properly qualified, motivated and prepared every day for every lesson. Teachers need to love their subjects and care for their pupils. Teachers need to go the extra mile. Teachers need to be good role models. Teachers need to understand that the profession requires you to give a lot more than any job description can detail. Teachers need to understand that we don’t get paid overtime. If you don’t enjoy teaching – don’t!
All of this is fine provided every corner does their bit. What happens when they don’t?
- When pupils don’t do what they are supposed to do, fingers are regularly pointed at the teacher. Often the teacher is blamed for the child having failed when the reality is that the child simply did not study.
- If teachers do not teach properly or are seldom at school, then pupils are forced to try to teach themselves or parents have to step in.
- When parents don’t teach their children basic manners and good behaviour, teachers are expected to take on the parenting role.
Clearly this is not how the system is meant to work.
Another problem is when role players deliberately choose not to stay in their corner. When this happens the education triangle becomes an education tangle.
- When high school teachers feel they need to “baby” their pupils, for example by spoon-feeding or sending pupils reminders of their homework for the next day, we’re crossing into their corner and, in so doing, we deny the pupil the opportunity of learning responsibility.
- When parents cross into the teacher corner by telling the teacher how to teach or criticise their child’s teachers in front of their child or deny teachers the right to discipline their child, it’s simply a matter of time before the child also tries to take over from the teacher.
- When parents do their child’s projects for them, or bring their lunch boxes to school because their child left it at home, they’re crossing into the child’s corner and, before you know it, you will be asking yourself what more you could have done when your child brings home a poor report card.
The system is not infallible. Of course parents cover for teachers and help their children with schoolwork – that’s good and necessary, provided the balance is healthy. Similarly, I’m not saying that schools can’t parent or instill morals – that’s an important part of what we do at school but surely we, as parents, can’t be comfortable totally abdicating our parenting role to the schools. When problems arise with the education triangle, often it’s because the base is unstable. Parents and teachers need to work together to support the child’s education. When that happens, the child is then able and equipped to do their bit and the end result is a child who flourishes at school.
Written by Mike van Haght (High School Principal)
First published in the Muse Magazine – click here.
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